but you promised.

I am back from a long weekend in Toronto and boy is my 'blog post' list getting long. As I am constantly thinking of things I want to blog about. While I update pictures from the trip, unpack all this dirty laundry and get my ears unplugged from all the flying. I wanted to share this.

I am a fan of Rick Warren's. There are many that are not. That's okay. Rick Warren isn't for everyone, just as toasted peanut butter and jelly sandwiches aren't for everyone.

Oh, I guess I am hungry....and boy does a toasted peanut butter and jelly sandwich sound good right about now.

I often find myself in these kinds of traps....and I have to consistently remind myself to not fall into them. Its easier to get in, than to get out.

Here is what Rick Warren wrote today.

It is a trap for a man to dedicate something rashly and only later to consider his vows. Proverbs 20:25 (NIV)

Have you ever ...

... promised to deliver by a set date and later regretted it?
... volunteered for a job you had no idea would take so long?
... agreed to a deal that looked great but wasn't?
... accepted an invitation you wish you hadn't?

Eventually, we all learn by experience a basic law of life: It's always easier to get in than get out! The Bible says, "It is a trap for a man to dedicate something rashly and only later to consider his vows." (Proverbs 20:25, NIV)

There are three common commitment traps:

• The Money Trap -- It's always easier to get into debt than out of debt! It's always easier to borrow than to pay it back.

• The Partnership Trap -- It's always easier to get into a partnership, or a relationship, than to get out of one!

• The Time Trap -- It's always easier to fill your schedule than to fulfill it! You can get so many irons in the fire that you put out the fire!

The solution: remember what the Bible says; don't make rash vows.

In other words, choose your commitments carefully; think before you speak; under-promise and over-deliver. With this, you'll build a reputation as a person of your word.

(Don't get trapped!)

Week Two Devotional - Sorry I am late!

Scripture:

I, the Lord your God, hold your right hand and say to you, "Do not fear, I will help you." 

Isaiah 41:13

Wow, I have never fully read that verse before. I have just always known and read verses here and there about "do not fear." I like this one, because I like that He says He will take my right hand, and help me." Now that is a great feeling.

Did you know that the word "FEAR", shows up in the bible 365 times?  God, really must not want us to fear, for he put it in the bible, one for every day of the year.  Check it out here.

Devotional:

It's okay with God for you to be scared to death.  He recognizes our fears and our insecurities.  I feel like the Spirit of God sometimes says to me, "You know Misty, I understand that you're not very happy about this.  I understand that you may be crying over this.  Cry, shake, whatever---but do My will, child.  Do My will.  I have victory for you." 

Discussion:

Okay, so I truly opened my mouth wide, raise eye brows and lean head down on right palm as I read this.  God is amazing.  He knew exactly the words I needed to read today.  I posted a post yesterday, and before I go further, I just want to first say THANK YOU.  Thank you all so much for either emailing me or leaving a comment with prayers.  It really means a lot to me.  It actually feels nice to know that you have people out there really praying for you.  

As I said in my post yesterday, I am broken.  I have been broken for the last year of my life.  No, actually I have been broken for the last 8 years of my life.  My life hasn't been a easy road since the year I had my son.  It has nothing to with my son, it has everything to do with my choices in life and God tightening up the rope and telling me, I have had enough slack, now it times to limit my own freedom.  When I say freedom, I mean, freedom in choices.  I don't seem to do a very good job sometimes with the choices I make in my own life.  

Just when I thought I was finally getting through the 'storms' of my life, I meet my husband, I get married, have another beautiful baby and start living and planning my life.  Notice how I said "my life." That's the problem right there.  I got to a place where things were finally looking good for me, I was blessed through amazing people in my life who help me get back on my feet.  I was getting stable in my beautiful home.  I was working, and traveling.  I was feeling so confident.  Although, I was appreciative for all my blessings, I have lacked giving God my attention.  Why do I always seem to do that?  Haven't I learned yet that if I can't find a balance in my good times in life for God, that he is going to continue giving me the dark days because that is when he most gets my attention. Now, I also know that there will be dark days no matter what, and I am learning to say to God, "thank you for these days too, how can I learn from it." But, let me tell you the truth, I am not so brave sometimes or so sincere when I say "thank you for these hard times, how can I learn."  

I am broken in my marriage.  It has been a full year since Halloween of last year to be exact, that my marriage really started to struggle.  We go up, we stay steady and then we fall.  We have a very crazy cycle of this that we just can't seem to get ourselves out of.  What's really getting scary, is that our make-ups are coming quicker and faster (a good thing), but our down times are getting darker and meaner (almost too painful).  Without exposing my relationship too much, or going into too many details, I will just be "transparent" here and let my life sort of be an open book and tell you, that I AM AFRAID (uncertainty).  I want to believe where my marriage will end up, but I struggle with my fears and doubts.  This is where this devotional comes in and pulls at my heart strings in big ways.

Devotional:

So even though you may be afraid about many things, don't be afraid to allow God to do His work in you, looking into the deepest part of your heart and releasing freedom in your life, teach you how to live in victory.

Discussion:

I feel just by reading that right there, that I have had a years worth of counseling given to me in one paragraph.  God knows where I am struggling, what I fear in my marriage and what I really need to work on.  So, why do I keep trying to figure it all out on my own? I have many insecurities in my marriage, and I have never been one to be or feel insecure in anyway. So why now, and why in my marriage?  I haven't figured that out yet.  

Devotional:

God wants to remove all your doubts concerning who brings the victory in your life. 

Discussion:

What? Let me go back and read that part again. 

"God wants to remove all MY doubts concerning who brings the victory in MY life?" 

I feel like a load just lifted off of my back and now I can go to sleep and make-up for all those endless nights of getting no sleep (especially these last 4 nights).

Devotional:

In the same way, no amount of determination will bring us freedom.  We learn to be victorious by surrendering our lives completely to the Spirit of God, not by gritting our teeth and try harder.  

Pride can lead to captivity. It becomes an obstacle every believer must face on the freedom trail.  What will you learn from the down fall of others?

We fear making sacrifices. But the irony is that we also make a lot of sacrifices when we are not living the will of God. How many things have we placed on the altar to Satan's kingdom? 

Without Christ, every women has intense insecurities.  Unless we find our identity in Him, we Christian women can be just as prone to insecurities about our appearances as unbelievers.  To Christ, the most beautiful person on earth is the one making preparation to meet the Groom.  

Discussion:

Well, that is like walking into a brick wall and having a brick still fall down on top of your head to give you a double bang to make sure you really heard right and are paying full attention.  

I am not really going to put in my thoughts of discussion here....I think this will be more beneficial (and private) if given this part of the discussion with God.  (For All of Us!)

I made a joke to a friend last night in an email.  I told her that I had slept with another man over the last two nights.  Then I continued to explain---- I have been so down right broken, frighten, hurt, disappointed, sad, uncertain, angry, tired, shaky, hungry, lonely, bitter, frustrated, anxious, nervous, worried, stressed, confused, weak.... I crawled in bed with my bible.  I clutched it right next to me, I kissed it, I laid my cheek on it and I shed tears on it (HIM).  Asking for Him to take the wheel, take control, put His hand over me and give me the peace and the courage I need to get through another night by myself, and lean not on to my own understanding of things going on in my marriage, but to give myself totally and freely to HIM.  ( FYI: My husband has not lived home in 5 months now, my daughter is 6 months and 3 weeks old). 

Please keep me, my family and my husband in your prayers.  I don't want to embarrass him by blogging too much about our personal stuff, but the bible says to not be ashamed.  We could seriously use the prayers.  

=========================

I hope this devotional touched you in some way and that it had as much power in its words to you as it did for me.  I feel like I can walk out of my house tomorrow a more free and confident women.  

My friend that I made the joke to about 'sleeping with another man', she sent me some verses to read, and I can't keep them to myself. I want to share them with others that may need to read them tonight also.

 

Psalm 27:1  "The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?  The Lord is the defense of my life; whom shall I dread?"

 

Psalm 56:3  "The Lord is for me; I will not fear.  What can man do to me?"

 

Psalm 57:1  “Be merciful to me, O God, be merciful to me, for in you my soul takes refuge; in the shadow of your wings I will take refuge, until the destroying storms pass by.

 

Jeremiah 29:11 “For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope.”

 

Isaiah 41:10 “…do not fear, for I am with you, do not be afraid, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand.”

 

Romans 8:24-26  “In hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what is seen? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience. Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but that very Spirit intercedes with sighs too deep for words.”

 Last night I did exactly that, I didn't pray.  I just said "Lord please hear my heart", and I let out a big sigh and fell asleep.  And, I had a really good nights sleep.

By the way totally of the subject, but I forgot to post it yesterday.  Morgan, my butterfly has not awakened in the middle of the night for her 2:00 AM feeding for an entire week now.  I only had to deny her, the 2-AM feeding one time.  How lucky am I?  She is sleeping through the night, she is taking more regular naps now....AND....and my little Butterfly's bottom right tooth did break through the skin.  It's so cute. Just the very tip of it is out, enough that you can see it and feel it's edges.  

Yes, yes...I have taken many pictures of it.  I will try to put them together and post them sometime tomorrow.  Morgan goes to visit her daddy tomorrow, and I have a meeting, a hockey game to attend and some laundry to do. Not to mention my nails that I can't even look at right now.  Want to talk about being ashamed, my nails are embarrassing. 

Prayer:

Dear Father, I want to just take this time to say THANK YOU.  Thank you for the many who have taken the time to actually pray for me, my family and my situation, Lord.  What a great feeling that is, knowing that people really do care and the power of prayer is simply that, POWERFUL!  

Thank you for this new day, a blessed day it was.  Lord, I know you know my fears, my struggles and my insecurities. I pray to you about them, but sometimes I probably don't pray the way I ought to.  Lord, I turn over to you all of those things.  I don't want to live in fear, the bible demands that we not do that.  Lord, I don't want to feel anxious, for you will provide my true needs.  I know this, but I allow my heart and mind to take over sometimes, please help me to stay focused on "your plans" in all of this.  Lord, only you know what the out come will be in my marriage and my future, no matter how hard I continue to manage it myself or the effort I put into it.  YOU are in control. Remind me that I need to let go, and take the "uncertainty" of life and just go down the slide, the slide of Your will, Your plan.  

Tonight, I want to give you all of me, the good the bad, and ask that you remove all of these negative emotions from me.  Let me walk in confidence and in peace, because I am a women of GODS.  You are my God, whom or what shall I fear? Right? I will let my light shine on and on and on..... I believe in You and I believe you can make anything happen. I witnessed I think my first real eye popping miracle when I got to read about little Stellan being born healed and perfectly healthy.  A child that was sentenced to death before his birth by a man call a doctor.  A Lord that can perform that miracle right before our eyes, is also the same God that loves me, loves my family, loves my husband and loves my marriage.  And in return the same Lord, I trust and that I love.

Thank you for your unconditional love.  

Amen.

  

Breaking Free Day by Day - First Blog Devotional

Scripture:  

For I satisfy the thirsty person and feed all those who are weak.  

         Jeremiah  31:25

Hello,

Today, is the first week devotional of 6 that we are doing.  I hope that you enjoy it and check back every week for our Blogging Weekly Bible Study.  

I encourage you to please read the scriptures out of the bible that I post, so that you fully understand and see the context in which these verses are used.  I want to speak "The Word of God" and not be one of those that can abuse or misuse the scriptures context.  

====================================

Devotional:

Can you think of anything you've worked hard at to attain that ultimately failed to bring you the satisfaction you expected?  We can easily be led into captivity by seeking other answers to needs and desires that only God can meet.  

Discussion:

I can think of a few things that I worked really hard on, thinking it was the missing piece in full filling me and making me the most happiest.  Acting - Yes, I love acting. I have a huge passion for it, and I have loved it since I was a young child.  My mom loves to tell the story about me as a kid, how I would always watch a movie, and then I would go to my room or outside and act out which ever character I found most interesting in the movie.  Modeling was also a fun passion for me.  My friends and I would save up allowance every week, and then we would go buy film for our cameras to play "photo shoots and models".  My mom still to this day has some of the pictures from our old modeling days.  I may just have to help her dig them up and post some to give you some giggles.  

I always said I would live in LA or Miami, next to the beach, in a big city and where I could do both my acting and modeling.  In Jr. High School, I explored band and drill team, by my freshman year of High School I then became athletic, drifted into being the school mascot "Black Panther".  I really loved getting to be free in my creativity. I loved coming up with my own dance routines and entertaining the fans.  By my sophomore year I tried out for the cheerleading squad and made it.  It was the coolest moment ever for a girl to make "try-outs" of the cheerleading squad.  In Texas, it was a "big" thing to play football and be a cheerleader.  Laughing just thinking about it!!! So silly right? But, I didn't know better or different at that time.

Well, I have completed and followed my dreams.  I have been a model and actress now for about 12 years.  I have lived in both LA and Miami (residing in Miami).  I have travel around the world and seen some amazing places.  I was doing it all.

However, I still didn't find myself to be fully satisfied.  Something was missing.  

Devotional:

Perhaps we each have experienced an empty place deep inside that we tried our best to ignore or to fill with something other than God. 

Discussion:

Finding myself still feeling as though something was missing or that I just wasn't 100% satisfied.  I began to think that it was because I didn't have "someone" in my life to share it with.  So I began finding myself trying to find that someone to share it with.  Only to end up with more disappointment, more heartache and closed roads.  Why am I feeling this way?  I still pray.  I still talked to God.  So why do I still feel this way? 

Devotional:

A crucial part of fleshing out our liberation in Christ means allowing Him to fill the empty places in our lives.  Satisfaction in Christ can be a reality.  He can make us feel complete.  I'm not talking about a life full of activity.  I'm talking about a soul full of Jesus.

Discussion:

That is why I was feeling that way.  I realized after many years of working hard, pushing harder and finding myself so distracted and busy with activities in my life.  I no longer had time for a relationship with God.  I no longer was attending church regularly.  I wasn't letting God be a full time part of my life, just a piece of my life when I prayed or wanted to ask him to help me land an audition.  Basically when it was a convenience to myself, as much as I hate to say that and admit that.  I dislike those type of people who only will be there or do things for others, only when it is convenient for them and or they are getting something for it in return.  Too many people are like that. Some of the closest people in our lives can be like that and they can be hard to love.  I was like that with God.  No wonder I wasn't getting answers or finding myself fully satisfied with my life. 

When I decided to turn my life around, attending church, getting back on track and giving ALL of myself to God.  Things in return started to change and fall into place.  Falling in place God's way. I gave myself fully to God, not allowing myself to really date or be involved in any type of relationship.  I made a promise to remain sexually inactive until I was married.  Making myself clean and pure for my future husband.  It wasn't always easy, but I trusted in God's plan for my life and for the future of my life with my son as a single mom at the time.  

After a long, long 6 years of what I would like to call hell, I finally broke down to God on a late ride home from Disney.  I cried and told God that I was lonely.  It has been 6 years since I have had someone that I could love and that loved me in return.  God, was doing some amazing things in my life during this time no doubt.  And, God surely likes to show off sometimes (one of my favorite things about him), for the very next day at church, I met my husband, Mark. I kid you not.  We both had been attending the same church for years but not once did our paths cross.  I would always sit in the front of the church and he would sit in the back of the church, and we always seemed to attend different service times on different weekends.  God was working in both of us and decided that it was time that we met.  We went to lunch that day after church with some friends and the rest is history.  Almost 3 years later, married for 2 and now parents to two children my son Hunter 7 years old and our little girl Morgan 6 1/2 months old.  

I am satisfied in full.  I have my relationship with God. I have my children, my family, my friends and someone to share it all with.  

There are days where I still feel like I am missing out on that other side of life. I know that is satin trying to mess things up. The fun, exciting stuff that comes along with acting, modeling and traveling, is all very attractive to the eye. Then I talk with God and I am reminded how lonely I was when I had all of that other stuff. I was too busy for anything else. It consumed me. I have just enough of everything right now. I have the right amount of modeling, the right amount of acting, the right amount of traveling and I have a whole other part of me that balances it all out, the kids, the family life and the mommy and wife side of things. 

I would never change a thing about my life right now.  I am so totally and abundantly blessed.  God has been so amazingly good to me and continues to full-fill my needs, not my wants necessarily, but my needs.  In truth, I don't find myself having many wants.  Just finding myself in moments of thinking I have wants to be met.  Then I am thankful of God for a lot of my unanswered prayers.

Prayer:

Father, I want to take this opportunity to say thank you for all you have and continue to do in my life.  Thank you for never giving up on me and loving me even when I didn't deserve your love.  Thank you for where my life is today. Thank you for my two beautiful and healthy children, Lord.  Thank you for my home I have to keep clean, and bring my family home to rest in.  Thank you for the food we have so easily provided to us daily.  Thank you for the circle of friends you have given me over the last few years, Lord.  Thank you for meeting my needs at always just the right moments.  Thank you for my career Lord, and for having my husband to share it all with.  

Lord, I know I still have days where I think I could still be doing more or I feel lost because I am not being more than just a mom or wife.  Thank you for always reminding me that I am exactly where I am supposed to be, and I rejoice in knowing that I am here,  because this is where YOU want me to be.  Although, I may not feel like much of a super hero and or feel as though I am doing much for the world in your name, Lord.  I know that I am a hero in my children's eyes, and that by raising them the way you want me to raise them, Lord.  I am in fact doing a lot for the future our world, by raising two Godly beings. 

Thank you for honoring me to be in my childrens and husbands lives. I am honored you chose me to share in their story that you have already written out.  I am truly amazed and thankful for you choosing me to be ME! Thankful not for those you chose to be in my story, but for those stories you chose me to be in (my daughter, my son, my husband, my friends, my family). 

Amen. 

==================================

Please feel free to leave a comment, question or prayer request. 

Until next week......

God Bless.

Today's Daily Christian Wisdom -

What is past is past. Today we start anew, and what we do today will make our life for tomorrow.