Tuesday, April 28, 2009

perfect timing

Recently Hunter my 8-year-old, has been rather sneaky about things, or being caught in little white lies here and there.  Its getting to the point that I am getting frustrated with him, and while expressing my frustration, trying to also instill valuable lessons in him.  Explaining to him that all these little white lies, that he often likes to play off (when busted!) as if he was really only kidding around or 'joking' with me. Telling him that all these little 'white lies' are like calling wolf too many times, and before he knows it, one day he will try to tell me something that would be important and the truth, but that I would be hesitant to believe him because of all his little 'white lies' he has told or continues to try and get away with.  

I am a person that a lie is a LIE.  No matter what! However, I also understand that he is a kid, and kids will also be kids.  So, I can't treat him and his 'white lies' the same way I would if the situation were coming from Mark, or any other adult.  Kids are still testing their abilities and limits, and we have all been there as kids.  We don't mean harm by them (as most adults will try to exclaim also), but the difference is that children really do and don't know any better.

Adults know better  -- period! 

Well, this weekend after Hunter's (again) double header, in which by the way my big man hit a HOME RUN.  After his game he came up to me and showed me this bump on his tongue, expressing to me that it hurt and bothered him.  

Suddenly, and instantly, a light bulb went off in my head, as I remembered what my parents once told me.  

"Wow, you must have really told a big one recently."  I said. 

"Told a big one what?" asked Hunter. 

"I BIG lie." I replied. 

His face looks up at me with both the expression as in 'get real mom' and 'is she serious right now.'  

"Yea right, mom." he tried to play it off.  

"Oh, yes it is Hunter, its called a lie bump!  If you tell a bunch of lies or one big one, God puts this bump on your tongue for two reasons.  1.  As a physical sign to your parents that you lied.  Even if your parents aren't aware of every lie you tell, God knows ALL of them.  2.  He places it on your tongue, because he wants to remind you that you have done something wrong. That your lies come from your tongue (mouth) and so he places an annoying bump on your tongue for a few days, to tell you, be careful little tongue what you say." 

As we continue to walk to the parking lot to find our car.  He quickly tucks his tongue into his mouth, while pretending we have moved on to something else to talk about.  

He gets into the car and as I begin to drive away, he tried to change the subject to going to Wal-Mart and getting a new Bakugan.  I had promised him for all his "GREENS" in school that he could get a new Bakugan.  

I thought, this is so my chance, I will make him REALLY think about all of his lies he has been testing out on us and make this a lesson to be hopefully and quickly learned.  He wouldn't expect something like this after just finishing up two baseball games.  

So I asked "hmmm, I know I promised you a Bakugan, but do you think by that bump on your tongue you deserve a Bakugan still?" 

He shrugs his shoulders in a disappointed manner, as his face turns into a pitiful look and he begins to stare out the window.  

So I say "listen, we will still go to Wal-Mart and get one Bakugan because I promised you this as a reward for something you achieved.  I will not punish you by taking away your reward for something you already earned. However, we do need to think about this lie bump on your tongue and what can we learn from it.  I want you to really think about it on the drive home okay." 

His eyes brighten up a bit, but the frown is still there as I get the "whew, I still get my Bakugan, but dang it, do I really have to think about this stupid lie bump? Is it REALLY a lie bump?" kind of face in response. 

Fast forward......

The next morning driving Hunter to school, the conversation went like this.

Hunter:  "Mom, do you think this bump is God's way of punishing you for telling lies?" 

Me:  "I think it could be God's sense of humor by placing a lie bump on the top of your tongue for not only your parents and yourself to see, but everyone else to know that you lied. I think God probably realized that if you didn't want everyone to see that lie bump on your tongue, then possibly you would learn your lesson by it and not tell lies to anyone again." 

He sits there, his brain trying to take it all in.

Hunter: "Mom, can you see the bump when I talk?" 

At this point I am still trying to keep a straight face, because by that last question, I totally know where that little mind of his has wonder to.  Will his friends at school be able to see the bump and know he lied?  Will his little girl crush see the bump when he says hi to her?  Will his teachers at school be able to see it if he speaks out loud in front of the class?" 

Me:  "I don't know let me look while you talk to me." 

Hunter:  "What if I just talked like this, can you see it that way." 

Me:  "Well, I can't see it that much, but I may wonder why you are talking so funny, keeping your lips pretty much closed while you are talking." 

Hunter: "How do I get this lie bump to go away?" 

Another light bulb goes off.

Me:  "You can confess your lies/sins to God, ask Him for forgiveness and tell Him if you have learned a lesson by this and will no longer tell lies big or small to your parents or anyone." 

As my light bulb is still shining. 

Me:  "But, just because you confess and God forgives you, because He will, just as I always do also.  Doesn't mean He will take that bump away right then and there.  He may leave it there just a little bit longer just to make sure you really have put your heart and thought into the lesson of telling lies, and will not lie anymore."

As we pull up to the school, you can see him gathering his things, while holding his mouth closed.  

I feel sort of bad that I am letting him go to school feeling worried and a bit insecure about this bump on his tongue, knowing it was probably caused by the many sunflower seeds he sucked on during his games.  However, when parents can't seem to get through to their kids, we use what we can to help us and THEM.  This "lie bump" came in perfect timing

Photobucket


Lie bumps

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Lie bumps (transient lingual papillitis[1] and fungiform papillary glossitis[2] ) are painful, hypertrophic, red and white papillae on the tongue.[1]


Cause

The name "lie bumps" is a result of a myth stating that telling a lie would cause one.[3] Lie bumps are often attributed to irritation of the tongue's papillae (taste buds) by sharp food or teeth.[3] However, very little has been written about this condition in scientific articles or textbooks and scientific studies have failed to produce a definite cause.[1] Possible causes include: "stress, gastrointestinal upset, menstruation, acidic or sour food, smoking, and local trauma" (direct physical irritation) of the tongue.[1]


Treatment

There is no specific treatment for this problem, other than using ice or numbing medicines to ease the pain. [4] Anecdotal remedies include gargling with salt water and direct application of hydrogen peroxide.[not in citation given]

9 Personal Thoughts:

Stewart Family said...

Cute story! My parents always told me the same thing. I'm sure I will be be using the "lie bump" story before long.

CIRCLE OF LIFE said...

lol that was awesome good thinking I would never of thought of that . You know in this day and age we need to be four steps ahead of our kids now a day's and instill the right and the wrong in them this is a great example of a lesson well taught. We can only do so much and by instill that God knows ect and is listening and watching it will stop and make him think huh. well we hope so .I am in awe how you kept a stright facve and were able to carry this lesson out that was amazing misty good job. nice want for the bag of worries on his back to come out and hopefully he learned something ahem amen.

Wanda said...

OK, that is jus too funny!

I've been following your blog for awhile now but never posted before.

You response was excellent! I too have encountered the 'little white lie' and have had to jump through some hoops to demonstrate the consequences but your is just brilliant.

I'll remember that.
Thanks.

Wanda
www.atlastmilanascominhome.blogspot.com

Jennifer said...

Great post, mama! That was perfectly captured for his future reference (and laughter).
I have a little "white-lier" myself. I just hung up with Ian's school. They're sending a book home for me to read about lying (and other common behavioral issues) and how to discipline him using specific words, etc.
Fun times!

I wish God would put a little lie bump on Ian's tongue....:)

Kristi J said...

Brilliant!!! I don't think you could have played that any better! My almost seven year old boy has been telling little "lies" and then saying it was just a joke. Now, I so wish he would get a little "lie" bump so I could borrow this wonderful lesson from you!

Love Being a Nonny said...

I hope you will give us a *follow up*
on this story!!!:)

Amy said...

Awesome lesson Momma! Oh! I am dealing with the same thing. Would it be horrible to feed Ash some sunflowers seeds all day in hopes of a lie bump to appear? HA!

Tiffany said...

This is pure genius! I mean.. for those parents who have kiddos that "lie". Cuz, that would certainly not be the case in my perfect house! LOL!

Good one, Misty!

amanda said...

My little girl has had a few of those, but I have just now learned what a lie bump is, and I know she fibs, and now thanks to this cute learning/teaching lesson I will have to apply that as well! Love the photo!

I have a similar story a friend told me. She kept having to stay on her son to keep his feet off of the table. While on vacation with her new husband, and his new stepdad while eating he placed his feet on the table yet again. His stepdad told him to get his feet off of the table or a bird would drop do on his head.

They left the resturaunt and a few steps later a bird did drop do on his head-LOL and he never put his feet on the table after that again.

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