I finally got a sitter for Thursday so that I can go and interview the other two schools on my list. I have to tell you though, over the last few weeks I have had mixed emotions about this. Should I wait? Am I ready? Is this really necessary? Am I being selfish? She needs this! This will be good for her. This will be good for both of us. Will she change for the better or worse? I don't want her to go. I WANT her to go. I can wait another month. I want her in there NOW!
You know how the roller-coaster can go, don't you?
Days like these last few days, that roller-coaster is going down fast and I am ready for her to be in preschool part time just so she and I can get a little break from each other. She is really starting to express herself, she is starting to learn how to yell and hit. Throw full blown tantrums. I often wonder it part of it is that she is so tired of being cooped up in this house with me, as I am with her, most of the time.
I find myself in a FUNK. Maybe even feeling a little bit depressed on days. Days like today or yesterday, when she just makes things so hard on me, and I can't get her to preschool soon enough.
I pray harder for more patients, as I am running low right now.
I don't want her to go. I don't want her to grow up so fast. However, changes are coming our way, in many ways and I am starting to feel its weight. The stress, plus going stir crazy of being home with a demanding, fit throwing and very active toddler 24/7 is enough to make anyone go crazy.
Did I mention that today she put a roll of toilet paper along with five tampons in the toilet, all in the matter of a few seconds that it took me to get a pair of jeans out of the closet and put them on.? Ugh!!!
So, although change can be scary, sad and pull at your heart strings. Change can also be fun, wonderful and rewarding. This is just one of the changes taking place...the reality that Morgan is ready and so am I (at times) for the change of her growing up, needing to be around friends of her own age and in an environment that allows her to be how she should be, busy and active. Engaged in fun child like activities and learning, and not home bored out of her mind, throwing tampons down the toilet.
This will probably be one of the easiest changes on our "things are changing" list.
But....
If you would please keep our family in your prayers and Ill be sure to post more on the other changes coming our way.
It is WEDNESDAY.... So we can use this post as His Will Wednesday too. If you have a prayer request please leave it in the comment box and I'll will be your prayer worrier tonight.
God Bless.
My request:
1. My grandmother, as she just found out this past week that she has breast cancer again. Its a Stage II cancer, however, being of the age she is, she does not want to go through chemo and radiation again. I don't blame her. Also, with all her medical conditions it would also not be wise to go through a surgery as big as removing her breast. She will be having a meeting in a week with the doctors to discuss her options, which will be to probably remove the lump as much as possible and hope it slows down and doesn't become aggressive. So please pray for her strength and courage through all of this. No matter what age, this is scary stuff.
2. Please pray for a friend I went to high school with named Tonya. She and her husband so desperately want another child and have tried for so many years. Please pray that God gift her with another child, or if that not be His plans that He gives them some peace and understanding of those plans.
3. Continue to pray for my "anonymous" friend. As she continues to walk through paths of a journey that would not be fun for anyone to walk on. She needs love, support, kind people in her life, forgiving people in her life and most of all faith to keep believing in her creator. Its not a nice world most of the time we live in, but I refuse to turn and focus on all the bad, when indeed there is still so much good and beauty out there. This person is a good thing, thats been through a lot of bad things. So pray that she continues to march on and not look back in her past, but smile with confidence for her future, as God promises to prosper us. I believe he will prosper this friend.
4. Prayers answered: One of the baby's I asked you to pray for went home, healthy. Yea!!!! I love seeing answered prayers.
5. Please pray for baby Brody, a 2 year old that had a pool accident. He is in a coma, not medically induced or anything. He has been in a coma now for 8 weeks. He has brain activity and movement in his hands and feet, but has not opened his eyes. Today he went home to be care for by nurses and his family while still in the coma. A very sweet family they are and this little boy is precious. You can follow him here. Pray for his eyes to open up and that God reveal His power through this little boy with saving grace.
6. Baby Stellan is heading back to Boston on Thursday and it will be discussed for another surgery on him. So many risk, so many things that can take place and we just pray for God's wisdom in these doctors. Pray for steady hands. Pray for peace for his family. Pray for a healthy Stellan to return home to his family soon.
7. My babies in my prayer roll to the left of my blog!!! Jonah! Ryan! Abby! Kate! Noah! Belle-Belle! Eden! Maggie!
8. Pray for children that are sick, that have been abused, abandoned, neglected and whom are lonely, hungry and scared.
9. For all my current friends and blog friends that are expecting!!! Congratulations! I pray for healthy pregnancies and births for all of you.
10. Pray for all the families that are hurting during the upcoming holidays.
11. I am also praying for BIG PRAYERS that GOD use me in BIG ways to glorify HIM and show people around me HIS kind of love, grace and faithfulness. I know that is a risky prayer, and I pray it with BIG FAITH!!!
12. I pray for "Clicks of Love" to bring many memories out of love to families and children that will are have traveled down a journey no parent should have to travel down. More on "Clicks of Love" soon to come.
13. Pray for a couple of families that I am aware of. Two of which are young new parents, both in which haven't recently given birth to newborns, and both mothers passed away from different causes after the birth of their newborns, leaving the new fathers widowed and a single parent. Also, there are a couple of families that I have recently learned about, that have medical issues and it appears that these ladies do not have much time left on their hands with their children and husbands.
14. Lauren, this amazing young lady only in her teens has cancer and has been told to not expect to make it to Christmas. Pray for her and her family.
Thank you for your prayers in return.
God Bless.
3 Personal Thoughts:
I had mixed emotions about sending Ryder to Pre-school two days a week this year. A friend told me that having that time away from each other and to yourself will make you a better Mom. I really believe that. She will have a blast and be pushing you out the door like Ryder does me.
Prayers from the Smith's...Joy
I am so in sync with how you are feeling. It is bittersweet and such a tough decision. I'll pray you find peace with it.
We are only home from China with our newest little one since Aug. She is 23 months and I'm exhausted keeping up with her. She's a bit delayed due to so much time in the orphanage but I know I have to enroll her at some point. Maybe 1 or 2 half-days in Jan (to keep my place on the list) and then a bit more next Sept. I know it will be great for her and very good for me and us too. But, wow, it's a hard decision.
Wishing you all the best with all your changes.
Wanda (At Last...)
Lifting these sweet families up to the Lord tonight.
Praying for you, too. You are such a great mom!
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