Dukes, Dawg and Kuhhh!!

Dear little Ms. Morgan Paige.

My baby love, my girl. I have had the urge to write you for the last few days, and it was going to remain an urge until I finally got to it. There is so much I want to remember about you right now today, and share with you along the way.

You are 16 1/2 month old, weighing 25 lbs and still 100 percentile in height. There is no getting around it baby girl, you are probably going to be tall, wait you are tall. That's okay, I am already reading over your agents contract and writing letters to Cindy Crawford and Heidi Klum telling them they can soon resign for there is a new beauty about to take over. :)

Baby love, my butterfly.....

You are one happy, cheerful, funny, busy, smart, sweet, fun and loving little angel. You really are so happy all the time. You love people. You love your books. Out of all the toys you have you reach for your books, babies and teddy...your three favorite things.

Your vocabulary is expanding by the day. Just tonight before bed we showed daddy how to give "dukes" and he about fell out of his chair and loved it. You make the cutest little fist. Daddy says "its a good solid fist too, not a little fist you'd think a baby would make." For the last 15 minutes before off to bed, you would run back-and-forth between daddy and me with your tight squeezed little fist to give us "dukes" and you would also say "doooks.' So cute.

We LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the sound you make when reading the story of Jonah and the Whale, and the part where the storm and lightening takes place. Every time we say the word lightening you make the sound "khhh." You truly are so smart.

Or the when going over other animals in the animal book, every time you flip the page and we get to the killer whale, you automatically make the "poof" sound of the water and air spouting out of the whales blowhole and it sounds like "p'hhh".

You now make the sounds of a dog, duck, cat, cow, panther, elephant, lightening, killer whale and moms growl when her ear and throat itches. Its pretty amazing how quickly you are learning and picking up things these days. You love to learn and want to learn.

When reading the word books and letting you point to all the animals or objects that you want us to say their names, you get in this pattern and in place of asking "whats that?" it comes out as a constant "dahhh" (as in what a sheep would sound like but with a D). Daddy and I will just look at each other and want to die laughing, but we hold it in and just love you up that much more.

You just started 'my baby can read videos' and you are in a trance when watching it. I can't wait to see you by your 2nd birthday and how much more you will know and be able to do. I should record it (and now I will) each month to show the difference.

Our little girl. Our little princess in the house. One loved butterfly.

You, my baby girl, have completely and totally stole my world and heart. Whatever was left from your brother and daddy, you have gotten it. You make my heart flutter daily. You make me happy and proud. You bring in such an amazing breath of fresh air to this family and home, that you complete our family chain. I am so content and so in love with your daddy, your brother and you that if this is where our family chain stops.... ITS PERFECT TO ME IN EVERY WAY.

Your smile, your chuckle and giggles. Your wild ever fast growing head of hair. Oh, how I could seriously eat you up one little nibble at a time.

You can tell us where your eyes, nose, ears, head, hair, toes and teeth are. You say eyes and nose pretty well, but the best is "dog" and sounds like 'dawg.' Daddy walks around say dog like you he loves it so much. Every time you touch your ears, you can't do it without making the sound of a monkey. See what I mean? I can just eat you up. Love you baby girl.

You love to run now, and are learning to climb on things. You have now even tried to climb out of the crib a couple of times, stretching out those long legs of your over the rail.

You have never fought your sleep times, nap or bed. In fact you have always willingly let me rock you and put you to bed for naps and bed so far. I love that by the way, so in case I forget to tell you later, THANK YOU. It made nights go smooth in our home. I feed you a bottle, rock you and put you to bed. Then go to bubba's room and tickle his back and then off to bed with daddy myself.

You are a great eater. You don't complain about anything. You love attention and being social, but when you want you are just as happy and content off on your own reading your books and talking to your babies. You are one loving mommy to your babies. You give them hugs, kisses and pat their backs. You tell them where their eyes and nose are too.

When we sing the clean up song, you love to help pick up your toys and bring them to mom to put away. Such a good little helper. You LOVE music in general. Anytime you hear a beat you start dancing and bouncing. You also try snapping your fingers, which is pretty darn cute too.

You also love to wear bracelets and things around your neck. Often you walk around with medals of your brothers like long oversize necklaces. If its round and looks like a bracelet, it will be a bracelet on you. You seem like such a girly girl in a sense, but yet you are so strong too. I just love it all, and everything about you.

You love feeding the baby ducks every day and running around in the sun and grass. You aren't afraid of anything, and that includes really big, deep pools, for you just run or walk right of into them with out thinking twice.

I often find myself staring at you. Just admiring you, adoring you and in love with you. It's so true. When you are teen and should we go through a ruff patch, I will love reading back on this and remind myself how you make me feel this very moment.

You are special little girl. I am not just saying that as your mom either. I sense it. I see it. I pray about it every night while I rock you. We talk to God about his special plans in your life. I thank Him so much for you being here in my arms each night, as I cry and hurt for the parents that have lost their own little girls or boys. Oh, how thankful I am butterfly to be so blessed and honored to be the mommy of you and your brother. You both make life that much more beautiful and worth the fight for.

Daddy and I were talking this weekend on the way home from church. I made the comment how I love the "team" God put together for us. Daddy is the head coach, mom the assistant coach, you and your brother the players. GOD our team manager. I love that he chose the four of us to share this life on earth together as a team, as a FAMILY. I thank HIM for that every day.

I could go on and on and on... and I may, I may not stop here. I love you so much and it just pours off my heart and my words. I love talking about you. Showing you off. I love holding, smelling, kissing and snuggling you.

You are my sunshine on any cloudy day. You and your brother have such love for each other it glows. You love him chasing you around and he is SO good to you and with you. You truly do have the best big brother ever. I love watching him with you and you with him. You adore him and says the sweetest things about you. I can't wait to see your relationship with each other continue to grow in years to come.

Baby girl, thank you for giving us some of the best belly laughs we have ever had and for the unconditional love and trust you have in us all. Thank you for being our little girl, our princess our butterfly.

Love you so so so so much...

Love, Mom

*Please turn of my BLOG music to the left in the side bar before playing a video!*

Personal Prayer Request....(UPDATED)

****UPDATE*****

As of today, Monday, there is no real update on baby Grace other than the doctors feel very optimistic about her delivery. They believed she could be about 4 lbs and the two days that have bought her in her mothers womb even better. She will probably be delivered with in the next 24 hours. Mom is well, and dad is anxious and tired, but over all both are in positive spirits. Daddy was telling Mark tonight via text that there was a 21-week baby born and so far is doing well, so this gave them a new sense of light I think and we are all very excited to meet baby Grace. Thank you for your continued prayers.

Uncle Donnie.

If you ever had the chance to meet my Uncle Donnie, he was the definition of "good o'southern country boy" from Texas. Uncle D. had a zest for life. He was always cheerful, laughing and thinking positive. He loved life. He loved his WIFE more than anything. He loved being out doors, hunting, fishing, working hard and being with his friends and family.

A few years ago they purchased some ATV's or as some would say four-wheelers. I am not really sure in the difference in the two. Maybe, Ill look that up when done here, but for now it doesn't matter. They loved taking the ATV's out, riding them, splashing in the mud and just being like God's little kids playing in the wild outdoors. They'd often use them to get around on the deer lease area where they would set up and get things ready for deer season.

That is what he was doing this week.

Uncle D. and Aunt Debbie were truly a match made for one another. Never apart, they worked the same jobs, traveled together and were the best of friends. Aunt D. normally would go with Uncle D. to the deer lease, but for whatever reason she decided to stay home this weekend. As Uncle D. calls Aunt D. to tell her that he got things done at the lease and that he and the boys were going to go play on the ATV's before it got too dark. Uncle D. told her on the phone he loved her, and wished she would have come out, because he loved having her around him all the time. They said "I love you's" and hung up the phone.

Off they go on the ATV's.

The paths were flat, and as boys would be boys, they are laughing, twisting back the accelerator and feeling the speed and the power of these man made machines. As he looks back at his buddies with a smile on his face, he hits a small dip and begins to flip multiple times.

As his friends watch in shock and race to his rescue, the ATV is laying on top of Uncle D. As Uncle D. tries to speak he tells his friend to get his phone out of his pocket, to call 911 and his wife. As they call for help, Uncle D's face begins to swell, blood pours out of his ears, he tells his friends he isn't going to make it.

After a long hour and so before the paramedics arrived back in the woods to where he was located, he wasn't breathing. Loading him up and pulling him out of the woods and to the care flight that was waiting for him, the continue to perform CPR the entire flight.

At the hospital they pronounced him dead, but doctors say he pretty much was dead on scene.

His neck was broken in several places, legs and others. His lungs were flattened. His skull crushed. That even had they arrived any earlier than the did and were able to keep him alive, he would have been brain dead and a vegetable for the rest of his life. His brain swelled so much, thus the blood out of his ears. His face swelled so much he was almost unrecognizable. They said that tons of blood had already piled up in his back on the spine. Basically, he was just dismantled in all the ways a human body could be.

At the hospital they only allowed Aunt D. and their son Randy in to see him. "It just didn't look like him," they said.

Aunt D. will be very lost for a very long time with out her husband, her friend, her companion, her leader, her protector, her love.... her HUSBAND.

Tomorrow, they will have a viewing for family and friends. On Wednesday they will have his service at the church my Uncle Danny (sister of Aunt D.) is a pastor at.

It was Uncle D's request to be cremated and then spread out in the wind and over the lake that he spent most of his days on, fishing, boating and loving life. His request will be honored and he will be remembered to me as a man of integrity, charm, kindness, fun, loving, thoughtful and the life of the party, Uncle Donnie! He will be missed a great deal.

Dear Aunt Debbie (and family)...

I am so sorry I am so far away and unable to be there to support you through this difficult time. In away I feel its also a blessing to me, for I am able to sit here and remember Uncle D. just as I know and knew him. I am not going to be traumatized by the image of his beaten up body. Instead, I will only have his smiling, laughing and bright eyes as the image to remain in my thoughts and memories forever, and in truth, I think Uncle D. would agree with me.

Although, I am not physically there, I am surely there in thought, prayer and heart. I hurt for all of you as my family and I wish this wasn't our families reality, but it is. Its going to be a hard bump to get over for some time.

However, at the end of the day and as we all mourn our missing family member.... when I think of Uncle D in all of this, I think he died...NOT IN PAIN....but a VERY HAPPY MAN who felt loved by his wife, family and friends. While he was out in the nature and wild life, trees, dirt, being the 'good o'southern country boy' he was. Being an example to so many on how to be responsible in life, love one another, work hard, do the right thing no matter how hard it is....but also living and having a little bit of fun in life along the way.

He didn't take things for granted. Instead he appreciated everything he had.

We will miss you Uncle Donnie.

**************************************

Ill be quick and brief.....

When it rains it pours.

Last night at midnight I received a call that my uncle Donnie had a fatal accident on his ATV. Ill will share more when I can. Please pray for my family and my aunt Debbie.

As well, last night our friends whom are pregnant with their first child are only at 29 weeks, and her water broke. They are trying to buy the baby a couple more days with giving steroid shots, for the lungs are not developed.

Please pray for this couple and their unborn daughter, Grace.

I may be able to photograph for them once we get more news. Lets pray that God has bigger plans for this little girl and that her lungs get stronger before she is born.

Thank you for your prayer.

The "MAN" teacher.

Believe it or not, my son started school this week as the rest of the kids on this part of the world have. He walked into the door and instantly became a third grader. Where did all the time go? Me, I have a third grader? I mean, I sometimes I feel as though I could still be in the third grade. Okay, more like the 4th, that was the best year ever. The point is, I can't believe I am a mother of a third grader.

Well, in truth, I can sometimes shock myself when I stop and have a minute to think and realize that I am a MOTHER, period. A mother of two children. A mother of an eight year old and an 16-month old. A mother of one girl and one boy. ME!

That is just so cool, but often seems as though I am reading in on someone else's life, so in awe that its MY life. God has blessed me abundantly with this life I live and wake up to every day.

As we attended my sons orientation last Friday at school. We met his super sweet teacher Mrs. Lynch, who has arrived from the Coral Spring NBP school to ours. They have moved ALL Coral Springs students to the Coconut Creek campus where Hunter attends. His meet and greet the teacher lasted a total of 30 seconds before he was off running the hallways of the school, searching out the list on all other teachers doors to see where his friends would be stationed for the next several months. While leaving me to get attacked by all those other people, you know, the other people they call "parents." Yea, its not my favorite part of orientation.

Don't get me wrong, its great to say hi and catch up with the "normal' parents of the school. The ones that can actually look you in the eye with real emotion and intent and carry on a legit conversation with you. While the others give you that big fake smile, that real high pitch voice and tap on the back kind of hug. I am sure everyone that is a parent of a child in school has experienced one or more of those kind of parents. You have haven't you? Well, if you haven't..... maybe you need to ask if you are one of "those" other kind of people. LOL. Just kidding.

Okay, so here I am standing in Hunter's class room, checking the clock as to how quick I can get out of there without looking rude to the teacher and other parents. As I chat with a couple of the moms that I actually enjoy, and then hope I don't have to come in eye contact with those I rather not deal with on my first day back.

I start searching out the hallways looking for my child so we can escape the zoo. I feel like Madagascar, the movie. Looking for all my routes and escape options.

Then my son and his friend run up to me, as they both already broke out a sweat from all the running around they had done and out of breath trying to tell me that his friend has a "MAN TEACHER."

Indeed he does have a man teacher. The boys say it however like "THE---MANNNN---TEACHER" as if it is something really BIG or SCARY even. THE MAN TEACHER!

They have never seen a man teacher before in all their 3 years of school. The men in the school are either authoritative figures in the school or teach a specialty subject like music or P.E. etc. All they have known are female classroom teachers. Its pretty funny when they talk about this man teacher.

Along with all this third grade hype, my third grade child thinks he is the coolest cat around. He is now wearing these aviator sunglasses, much like the ones his mother wears. But yet, he considers himself "cool looking" and I "nerdy looking," what gives?

Yes, to my third grader, the one whom recently also thinks he knows everything and is trying to express such smartness and coolness, saying that I embarrass him. When I pull up to drop him off some place, he wants me to turn down my music, because it isn't the music that HE believes to be cool. I am listening to Casting Crowns by the way. See what I am dealing with here?

Ok, so we have all been there and done that with our own parents, I know that. However, I don't think I ever verbally felt brave enough to tell my parents these thoughts out loud. I was a please'r and never would want to hurt or disrespect anyone like that.

My son will not even kiss me in public anymore, especially if anyone of his peers are around to witness it. I basically have to threaten to REALLY embarrass him if he doesn't give me a kiss good-bye, and most of the time he gives in, taking my word on REALLY embarrassing him, so he then leans in and gives me the "yea, yea, get it over with" kind of kiss good-bye. I don't care, because at least I know should that be the last time we see each other, he knows he was loved by me, cool or not.

Besides, doesn't my kid realize who his mother is? I am Misty Rice (Baniewicz), a fun, fearless, world traveler, adventurous mother. I am SO cool. He has no idea how cool his mom is. LOL

Okay, so maybe I appear to be cool, and underneath all this coolness, is truly a big fat dork (probably so), and he just sees the dork side of it all. The one that is always on his case about brushing his teeth, doing his homework, cleaning up his mess, eating his veggies and giving him that parenting kind of answers to any topic discussed between us.

I have to constantly remind myself that he is not my friend, I am not his friend. That he is the child, I am the parent, and that I do all the things that I do for him, out of love, for him. If along the way, he learns to respect me and appreciate my parenting toward him and then we become friends on top of that, then I am blessed.

Its way too easy to fall into the "my feelings just got hurt" by an eight year old boy that I love and work so hard to provide and protect, that we can tend to slack and not push them so hard. In the long run that is more harmful to them than doing the strict parent route. Often we as parents can also fall into the "fallen world" of things and not be the best examples to our children, sometimes acting like children ourselves still.

I found myself like this the other morning.

I am not a morning person, but I have improved a great deal over the last 20 something years. Except for this one morning. Ahem.

It was the first day of school, and all through the house, it was going just fine as to my little plan. When all of the sudden, it was time to leave. My son hadn't brushed his teeth. As I told him to for the millionth time, and as we begin to rush out the door. We begin to argue about his book reports he had and hadn't done correct. As we are trying to rush out the door, and while arguing over who was right and wrong, he little smart mouth was testing my patience big time. As I am pulling out of the garage, there is a white table leaning up against the cabinets in front of my car. It decides to fall on my car as a am backing out putting 4 small dents in the front of my bumper. I became fumed, and yelled at my son at the top of my voice. Something I try to not do ever, because we all know that not much if anything is being heard through yelling. This day however, I was fed up with his mouth, him thinking he knows it all and the table on my car didn't' help.

So, I am driving, yelling, mumbling curse words under my breath. In perfect timing, Morgan makes us all laugh. As she is sitting in the back waving her finger around just like mommy, jibber-jabbing as if to repeat everything I am saying. It was hilarious and just what was needed to cool the temp down in the car at that moment.

Finally, we arrive at school as the rest of the ride there was pretty quiet and uneventful. I say good-bye, tell him I love him and drive off.

At that instant the guilt set in, that I was yelling at him on his first day of school. So not necessary. So not needed. So not cool. See I am not as cool as I think I am, most of the time. Most of the time, I am just a little human being that screws up more than I like to with a temper that can pop out like a firecracker when least expect it, when my buttons are pushed too much.

I felt guilty all day long about it.

The first thing I did when picking him up from school was ask him about his day, and then took the opportunity to teach my son about being human in a fallen world. However, even parents (like mom) can fall, and make wrong choices and be impatient. I apologized for yelling at him. I apologized for losing my temper. I apologized for making a poor choice in my actions and that I was wrong for making the choices I made, regardless of the choices he chose to make. I told him that him making wrong choices and upsetting me, doesn't give me the right to make a wrong choice in return. Although, that seems to be the most natural and easiest of things to do. That he too will remember this conversation and he too will have moments where someone will make the wrong choice, and he then will have the opportunity to make better choices, the right choice of his own.

My point?

Well, I feel better sharing that bit of our week. And maybe someone else needs to read it and be reminded, that although you may be parents of your children, you are NEVER bigger, better or too good or above to apologize to your children when you have made poor choices. If you ever feel that you don't have to apologize to your kid, because they are "kids." Then you disrespect them and devalue them, and that makes you a coward. In order to teach, you must lead by example. You will expose your children to sin and errors, you can't control that, you are a human. So take those opportunities to also lead by example on how to respect all people and apologize to your children when it calls for one.

As we reach the middle of our first week back to school, and retrain ourselves to the school routine and schedule in our home. I need to figure out a way to get my kid to realize he IS as cool as he thinks he is, he will realize later that he wasn't as cool as he thought. I don't want to rob him of that now. But I do want to get him to see rather sooner than later, that his mother is cooler than he thinks, like today. Do you think I have a chance? Yea, probably not.

That's okay with me....

I am a legend in my own mind anyways. I think I will focus on controlling my tone with my know-it-all third grader instead. I need prayer for patience and parenting wisdom. Its not easy being this uncool cool, raising descent, respectful, smart and loving children in a very mean unloving, UNCOOL world we live in. Its tough.

I look at Morgan and I am reminded how little, sweet, affectionate, kind and tender my third grader once was. He always wanted to please mommy and daddy. Such a sweet loving little boy. Now he is a "thinks he is cool, knows it all and has a mouth to go with it all" THIRD GRADER!!!!

Put a straight-jacket on me now, while I still have a chance. Sigh!!!!

How is the first week of school going in your home?

These are the two struggles right now in our home the MOST, aside from his MOUTH! He hates to brush his teeth and its like pulling teeth to get him to brush them each day.

He wanted to grow his hair out over the summer so he could have "hockey" hair. He wants it long in the back so it sticks out of his helmet. I went a long with it for the summer, but the first day of school I was the one embarrassed by my son arriving at school with hair that looked like.... I don't even know what it looked like.

Thankfully, he came home as the teacher told the class that if their hair touches their collar then they have to get a hair cut. SWEEEEET! It takes the headache and fight off my back of being the bad parent and making him cut it off. So, here we are getting it cut by our awesome Rodrigo, the man that makes his rounds on house calls!!!

His Will Wednesday

Do you have a prayer, need, request or a thanks for an answered prayer and need a safe place to share it?

You have come to the right place. A christian faith blog, with a ton of prayer worriers. If you are hurting, struggling, healing, changing, trying, worried, happy, thankful, stressed, angry, confused, scared, sick, sad, unsure and even lost.

It doesn't matter, because HIS love is deeper than anything you are going through or experiencing. You just need to trust Him enough, believe in Him enough, and even allow Him enough to show up in your life and prayers.

Please leave your prayer request in the comment section, and know that people are reading them and praying for you. And I once read and LOVED this little chain idea. If you do not read all prayer request, while you post your own request, will you please take the time to say a prayer for the person right above your comment?

I personally will read each and everyone myself and pray over them.

1. Prayer request for, we will call her "Sister in Christ", God knows her needs. So please just pray for her.

2. Please pray for baby Ryan, his photo is in my prayer roll to the left of my blog. He is getting ready for heart surgery this week.

3. Please continue to pray for the McGovern family as they continue to figure out how to walk this road, after the loss of their 19 month old daughter, Edna Mae.

4. Please pray for a family I grew up with, as their dad, and my little league soccer coached lost his battle to cancer.

5. Please continue to pray for baby Kate, as she and her family fight for her life with brain cancer.

6. Courtney in the boys recently lost their furry family member to an accident, please pray for them.

7. Please pray for MckMama's friend, as they recently discovered her unborn baby at 33 weeks has STV, the same heart condition (or similar) to Stellan's.

8. Please pray for my grandmother, as they are going to try and work with her and teach her to walk again. If not, she will be bound to her wheelchair for the remaining time of her life.

9. Please pray for my neighbor Paul, a wonderful friend, husband, father and grandfather. He survived a major stroke many years at a young age, that has placed him in a wheel chair. He has had some issues with infection leg that is causing him a lot of discomfort.

10. And of course continue to pray for all my the babies in my prayer blog, and any other child or baby that needs prayer. That is my soft spot and my love runs over for all children. They are so innocent and sweet, so pray for those that are sick, in pain, lonely, hungry, homeless, without parents, scared, frightened, abused, neglected, abandoned and unloved in anyway.

*Please leave your prayer request in the comment box, and please pray for the person above you in the comment box. The chain and circle of prayer is powerful.

Have a blessed day.

His Will Wednesday

Do you have a prayer, need, request or a thanks for an answered prayer and need a safe place to share it?

You have come to the right place. A christian faith blog, with a ton of prayer worriers. If you are hurting, struggling, healing, changing, trying, worried, happy, thankful, stressed, angry, confused, scared, sick, sad, unsure and even lost.

It doesn't matter, because HIS love is deeper than anything you are going through or experiencing. You just need to trust Him enough, believe in Him enough, and even allow Him enough to show up in your life and prayers.

Please leave your prayer request in the comment section, and know that people are reading them and praying for you. And I once read and LOVED this little chain idea. If you do not read all prayer request, while you post your own request, will you please take the time to say a prayer for the person right above your comment?

I personally will read each and everyone myself and pray over them.

Morgans first art work.

Jonah and the big fish. She made this at church yesterday. And she
said "bubbles" for the first time also.

She is so smart.

Sent from my cool iPhone.

The family chain is broken, Edna Mae is with Jesus.

The Broken Chain Poem

We little knew that morning that

God was going to call your name.

In life we loved you dearly.

In death we do the same.

It broke our hearts to lose you.

You did not go alone,

for part of us went with you

the day God called you home.

You left us peaceful memories.

Your love is still our guide.

And though we cannot see you,

you are always at our side.

Our family chain is broken

and nothing seems the same,

but as God calls us one by one,

the Chain will link again.

By:

Ron Tranmer

Please pray for this family. I will be attending the services this week. My heart is hurting painfully deep tonight.

Does this count as Vlogemo? - Win an 3GS iPhone like me?

Yeap, I just won a brand new 3Gs 16 gig iPhone last week and I am really enjoying the video recording I am getting of my kids. Thanks to a really cool email site for graduates or college fans, Gradmail.com.

Watch this video I recorded with my iPhone. The sound and quality ROCKS!! Then follow the steps and you too will be on your way to win a new iPhone.

I personally know not 1, not 2, not 3, not even 4 (and that's a lot), but 5 people, and then myself so that is 6 total if you were keeping count, that has won brand new iPhones as well. You can see other winners and their videos at www.gradmail.com. Have fun and good luck.

Pause sound track down on left sidebar first!

OK, so Bloggers upload is not the best in quality, so if you can or want just go to this link instead:
Click here for YouTube version!

it's the iPhone's fault...

Well here we are another week, another day and another unexpected post. As baby girl is down for the night, Hunter and Mark sitting on the couch debating about the Yankees-Red Sox game. Right now it is the top of the 4th with no runs. I love my Yankees fan (Mark) and Red Sox fan (Hunter), and I very much enjoy sitting over here listening in on them as they talk baseball.

I have to admit, I was off to a rough start tonight as baby girl was just giving me a hard time. She really is either teething, not feeling well or both. She does have a bit of a cough and I think I may take her in tomorrow to have her looked at. It all started last week after we took my guest {Daniella Summers and her family} to the beach Monday and Tuesday. Morgan had such a great time at the beach, but got a little too brave at times (actually A LOT of times!) and ran right into the ocean herself, only to have face flopped right in the water. She swallowed so much of the ocean water between Monday and Tuesday that she had several very dirty diapers the next two days after that. Then along came a little runny nose and a cough. It could be from the beach days, or simply that she is coming down with a cold. It could also be a mix of her immune system being over worked right now from teething not one, not two, but three molars in at once. The tips all have finally made their break through in her gums. Poor baby girl. What ever it is, its keep mommy very exhausted.

I really do feel like such a bad blogger lately. I ask myself "what makes a bad blogger?" To me a bad blogger is a blogger that takes pride in saying they would call themselves a "professional blogger." A professional blogger would say that they blog every day or on a very regular and consistent basis. I used to blog every day and or at least very regularly. Then summer came along and then I found myself busy with two kids at home, travel and everything else in between, blogging sort of just slipped to the back of the line.

In truth, and I recently told my friend Daniella while she and her family where here that I found myself feeling better emotionally not blogging and or reading blogs as often. It has allowed me to focus on my family, my kids, my home and has given me a little bit of an emotional break from all the heartache you read and hear about through the blog world.

Part of me felt that I was giving too much of my energy and time to my blog and for whom and why? Sure I have followers. Sure I have loyal readers. Sure my family and friends peek in often to see any new post to be read. I appreciate that, I really do. However, I do ask myself at the end of the day, are those the people needing so much of my time and attention? Or do I really need that much of their attention given to me and my blog? What was it that made me feel that I need to blog so much to random people that I barely knew? Why did I feel that I needed to "pretend" to be a professional blogger and sacrifice time with my children, my husband, my house chores or even time to do something for me, just so I could post about a happy life here and receive compliments or attention from strangers? Its all really so silly.

Don't get me wrong, you guys are not silly. I am saying, that "I AM" silly. My thinking is silly. My motivation is silly, although I didn't realize how much I was actually thriving off of my social life and attention being received on my blog. UNTIL....... my new iPhone, Twitter and Facebook exposed me over the last few weeks.

Actually, I have to admit a very SAD but honest truth here. I had not seen anything, no previews, no commercials or reviews of any kind regarding the movie "Funny People." All I know is that Mark wanted to see it. Daniella and I thought we would surprise our husbands out for a double-date to a nice dinner and a guy movie of their choice. We went and the movie was AWFUL. It was so bad that Daniella and I even walked out of it and got our money back. I was disappointed that the husbands stayed in as long as they did, instead of taking their wives hands and walking us out themselves, it was that tacky and crude. But that's another post...

However, before we walked out of the movie, there was a scene where Adam Sandler is doing stand up comedy for a crowd and they are ripping away on myspace folks. At one point he said as part of his act in a mocking funny voice tone "I am so cool, I have over 1000 friends of myspace" and then continued by saying "oh yea, you have that many friends of mysace, how many do you really have in person? It's Friday night, how many are you hanging out with? Oh, thats right your not, instead you are sitting on your computer talking to your 1000 friends on myspace."

I thought the comedy act and what he was saying was pretty funny and right on for so many. Its no different in a lot of the blogging, tweeting and facebook world either. We all keep up with how many followers we have. So many of the blogs out there even do giveaways, and instead of just doing a giveaway, they make this 'to-do-list' and one of the things on the to-do-list is to FOLLOW THEM, then post about THEM, then tell others to FOLLOW THEM. WHY? Because they need the attention or the popularity vote I guess. I don't get it really.

Why do we (and I say we, because I have been guilty of keeping tabs with my followers count to the left of my blog), but I have never done a giveaway to seek more followers or gone blog hopping asking others to follow me. That is almost like the little girl in 4th grade that goes around and just ask everyone she can to be her friend. Feeling the need to have the approval of any person or other blogger out there.

Am I hitting on any soft buttons right now? It is NOT my intention at all, I promise. It really is all just coming out as I type. In fact, I don't really even know where this blog post is heading, other than just a bunch of jumbled misspelled words and rambling. But that is okay, because tonight I am blogging because I caught a moment and felt like it. I am not blogging about any random cool story to entertain my "followers" or update my family of the kiddos, although I am pretty behind at doing both. I am simply blogging, just to blog. Mark just came into the kitchen to get a snack and asked what I was doing. I answered "blogging!" He said "about what?" I said "about blogging." He said "blogging about blogging?" I said "yeap, just blogging about blogging." He thought that was funny and we both started laughing.

Don't get me wrong, I am not going to quit blogging. I enjoy blogging. I am just not going to feel the "urge" or the "need" or the "responsibility" and or the "guilt" of blogging. I am NOT a bad blogger, I am just not a 'professional blogger' at all. In fact, if I were a professional blogger wouldn't the blog administrators have contacted me by now to post some ads in my sidebars or something? That seems to be the biggest sign that you have gone pro when someone wants to place ads on your sidebars. I don't have those, so I am not a pro. I am not going to be a wanna-be any more and then find myself still very lonely, or unpopular or exhausted either. Lonely, because I am only talking to myself when I spend so much time blogging or reading other blogs, when in truth I need to make more effort and get out and make real face-to-face friends in my life. Unpopular, because I do get hundreds of hits when I do regular post, but maybe about seven loyal commenter's, and well this isn't high school I don't need to be blog popular. Exhausted? Yes, exhausted. I have found myself so many times mentally and emotionally exhausted from blogging, commenting on other blogs, trying to keep up with total strangers blogs, that don't even know me, care to know me, or even care to come read my own blog. I have learned that a lot of bloggers are selfish bloggers. Its all about them and their lives. That's okay too. Its not a bad thing. I just don't want to be exhausted anymore, have my days and hours go by while my toddler is off playing by herself, when I could be and rather be playing with her, and or trying to post a blog in the late evening after everyone has gone to bed, just to get a post in, then to find myself up way late, tired and more exhausted when I wake up the next morning. So tired that I don't get out of my PJ's that day, and I am cranky, annoyed at my dirty house and then I find myself thinking and feeling depressed about all the sad stuff I keep reading about. A roller-coaster that should be and can be avoided.

My husband then wonders why I am in tears, or feeling depressed and unhappy. Its no ones fault, but MY OWN. Sure I titled my post "it's the iPhones fault".... that was starting out as a joke. I was going to blame the iPhone for my bad blogging behavior, but then my mind and fingers took over with out my permission and started typing out the "THE UGLY TRUTH" about my personal blogging thoughts and behavior. Speaking of "The Ugly Truth," other movie for a THUMBS DOWN. It was a bit funny, a bit cute, but a lot of tacky and profanity also. Just a lot of unnecessary script in there. Anyways, not spending time on that here either tonight.

Back to the iPhone. The iPhone has substituted a lot of my own personal entertainment and attention I feel I for whatever want, need or seek that was originally coming from blogging. Plus, I like being a bit nosey in others more exciting and entertaining lives. It almost appears as though as everyone "tweets" or updates their "facebook status" competing with the next person on who is doing the most exciting stuff. I say that with humor, I am not really taking a personal punch at either sites. I am on there all the day and daily myself. In fact, I joke with my friends "I can't quit Twitter. Twitter had me at first tweet." Its pretty ridiculous actually. We have our new phones, including my brand new 3GS iPhone 16 gig that I just WON. Yes, I already had an iPhone. My husbands phone died yesterday, he got my other iPhone, while I am enjoying my NEW iPhone with the video camera. It's an awesome phone and I can't wait to post some pictures of my kids on my blog now for family to see more often.

Imagine this? I had to "tweet" about them, and spread the word about them to up my chances to win. But they are a company seeking business, and so I get that, that's the difference. I didn't mind spreading the word about them, tweeting about them and even FOLLOWING them on Twitter. In fact, I have already won my phone, and no longer need to tweet about them, but I do. Know why? Because I like their company, I think its great and people should check it out and I feel really thankful for my NEW iPhone. But this tweeting thing? This tweeting thing is such a joke, but yet I still fall into the trap. I still check it often during the day. I still see if anyone "direct messaged me or mentioned me." I still glance to see the number of followers I have. I even decorated my twitter home page. Does anyone other than me even see my home page on Twitter? I mean really? Who are we kidding? I instead want to make more time in my day for the "real" humans in my every day life, including my two kitty's who think they are human. Instead of blogging or tweeting, I need to get out and give them (cats) a daily brush out. Something they love, could use because they are getting up in age and aren't as able to do it themselves.

The world of electronics are seriously taking place of our true friends and companions. We become so reliable on them, only to find ourselves at the end of the day still feeling lonely, lost and empty. Only to get up and think that if we blog more, tweet more, comment more and get more followers, then we will feel more popular or less lonely. Sorry to disappoint you folks, it still feels the same. If you don't get out and smell the fresh air, get out and have some physical connection with your family or your friends, or even make new friends.... you may have 1000 followers on twitter, facebook, myspace and blog sites. At the end of the day, how many people do you have standing around you, ready to hug, kiss, greet, socialize, talk, listen, support and live with you?

It's not the iPhone, Twitter, Facebook or Blogs fault. Its my fault. Its almost like a drug, and easy to get addicted to.

*As the Yankee fan gets all excited over A. Rods home run at the bottom of the 7th.

The addiction of feeling liked, wanted, interesting, popular, busy........ sounding and appearing in our tweets and blogs like anything other than what we really probably are....alone, lonely, bored and going stir crazy from it, or all becoming a bit ADD in our fast paced, always need a thrill, need to be doing something kind of society. Instead of reading books, people read blogs. Instead of talking on the phone, people read Tweeter updates of friends, strangers and celebrities (or people pretending to be celebrities).

So, I have decided that I will blog when I feel like blogging. I will update about my kids often so I can truly keep my family in other states updated on the kids. I will be cleaning out my "following" list and not follow so many other blogs, or leave comments on strangers blogs, to never know if my comments even get read, are appreciated or if they even know me in return, care to know who I am or read my blog or about my own family. I am giving too much of my own time to too many people I don't know and that could probably care less about me. You know what I mean folks? Do you feel the same sometimes, but afraid or even ashamed to admit it. Not me! I just feel real silly! A high school girl blushing for admitting the truth, but no shame in it. Just need to change it and fix it, thats all.

As for as His Will Wednesday. I would really love to keep that going though, but at the same time I don't like the feeling of guilt or let down when I find myself busy with the real physical beings in my life and I forget to post a HWW, as I did the last two weeks. However, I will try to post date those so that I don't forget them, and we all still have a place if it be one person or 100 people needing prayer, that one or that 100 prayer request is prayed for. I will personally pray for any prayer request left on those days. If I do forget to post a HWW, please leave a comment on the last post I posted anyways, and I will get it and I will pray. I promise you that much. That I do take very seriously.

So anyways, I have rambled about nothing really for four innings here now. It is now the top of the 8th, Yankees leading by one. Hunter just fell asleep on the floor snuggled up to Milo, and Ill post that picture here soon on Twitter. That stuff is fun to share. I know my REAL friends and family (and some of my followers) will actually enjoy that picture.

I think I am going to shut it down, go take a HOT shower and go to bed. Tomorrow my boy goes to a "fun" camp (and a new camp). I will play catch up day on getting bills paid, house cleaned and laundry finished. I think I am going to take Hunter to the water park next Saturday and then let him actually have a lemon-aide stand. He has been wanting to do that and I keep putting it off. Its time that I not and just let him have his fun.

Sorry if I stepped on any ones toes. Not what I am trying to do here at all. I am, if anything, mocking my own self and really sort of just letting out my thoughts and feelings on why I feel so guilty about not blogging, when I shouldn't feel guilty at all. I am getting my priorities in order and putting the people that really do care about me, that really no matter what I am doing find me exciting, cool and fun. That no matter how I am dressed or what I am wearing think I am pretty. That when I comment to them, the actually comment back with something. That actually can go have lunch with me. That can actually give me hugs and kisses. That can let me vent and give my positive advice in return. And yes, some of you do some of this even via blog, twitter and facebook and probably would do it all if you lived near me. Trust me I know. This isn't towards any of you. Please know that. My tone in this post tonight is light, humorous and scattered. LOL

Uh-ho...now the Red Sox are up 2 to 1. My back hurts and you see.... I can ask my husband to rub it for me, I can't ask that of you. HA! So I am not going to pretend to be a professional blogger anymore. I am not going to feel like I need to keep up and post often. I am not going to keep tabs of who I leave comments for or how many followers I do have. I will just be me, and blog when I feel like blogging and whatever I may feel like blogging about, even if it makes no sense at all like this one here. Ill continue to tweet, and check in on my friends on facebook, but I will not blame it on the iPhone, computer, Twitter, Facebook, Blog or Computer for my lack of anything getting done, loneliness, boredom and exhaustion for the way I feel at the end of my days. Those are all things called electronics and they have "off" buttons. My husband, my kids, my family and my friends do not. I want to start hearing real voices again.... so I am going to start making effort in my own world and come out from my "oh so busy social life on the internet" and enjoy my less busy social life with my few but very cool, real and loving friends I do have here around me in my life.

I enjoy you blog friends of mine. Don't worry, I am not going anywhere. Ill be reading and keeping up still. Just not every day as I have been trying to. So don't think I have moved on and beyond all of you.

*Husband just jumped up and yelled "YEA!!! DAMON!!!" as Damon hit a home run! Tied game!

I think I'll close and go enjoy the last inning with him as the game heats up and gets exciting. Well, too late, as my boy Teixeira just hit another home run right after Damon. WOW!! Well I actually couldn't see it, as Mark was standing up in front of the TV watching the ball very closely to make sure it made it inside the foul bar. LOL

Until my next blog folks..... take a little advice from me tonight and stop trying to entertain us out here that read YOUR blogs. Go enjoy the real people in your life. Read a book! Read the bible! Spend time in prayer! Go on a walk and enjoy nature with your kids. Play board games. And then and only then will you feel like the head cheerleader or the captain of the football team. Then and only then will you not feel bored or lonely. Get out and take charge and get back involved in the lives of those around you, and not so much in the lives you read about on the internet. That's what I am trying to do.

Good Night.

As the Yankees wake up the stadium with back to back home runs and lead the Red Sox 5 to 2!

Laughing as I just read over my post, and realized I was typing so fast and so lazy that I spelt about every other word incorrect and half of what I said makes little to no sense at all, but guess what? I don't care! I am not even going to go back and correct my errors. Not tonight, anyways!!!

Prayer Request - Edna Mae

Dear Friends, Family, Followers and Prayer Worriers....

I know I have been neglectful of my blog over the last few weeks, and I apologize. As the summer starts to come to an end, schedules get back in place and my days open up again, I am sure to resume back to blogging on a regular basis again. Bare with me.

With that being said, I would like to ask that you please take a moment and pray for this little girl and family that attends my church. I do not know this family personally, but I have several dear and close friends of mine that do. A few of my friends are teachers at the church school, in which this family attended and the mom very active as well. They are a faithful Godly family and are in so much pain and fear right now.

Their little 18 month old daughter, the youngest of three girls, was found Monday evening laying in her pool having gotten through the child safety gate. When medics arrived they were not able to resuscitate her. Having lost heart function and kidney function, but then was able to gain both of them back at the hospital.

Over the last couple of days the family thought they had hope, when it appeared there was some brain function (little, but some) taking place. The most recent scan however, shows that there is less and very, very little function taking place.

At this time the doctors have given up hope, and so this family only have prayer and a miracle left in their hands for their youngest baby girl. I can't even imagine being a parent and hearing those words or reading them as I sit here and type. Its a very painful reality to this precious family and they desperately need your love and prayer.

I know people continue to want updates, but they are being very cautious with the info they want to share at this time, and I am sure as any parent would be, we all understand. So please, instead of constantly asking for updates, just know that GOD knows the update and continue to pray. I will also do my best to fill you in either here, or through my Twitter updates to the left of my blog if you are not a Twitter follower.

Attached are a couple of photos and I really appreciate you taking the time to pray.

And while I am here, please forgive me for missing the last couple of weeks HWW (His Will Wednesday). I really apologize for that. There is one person that I will leave anonymous at her request, and ask that you just pray for her. Again, God knows her needs, and I just ask that you pray for this sister of ours.

I hope that you and your families are well. I am browsing the blogs here and there trying to keep up with all of you also, but if I missed anything or anyone I apologize.

God Bless.

Edna Mae - 18th Months